“JUST FOR ONE DAY is A TRIUMPH IN SEXUALITY. THIS IS NOT PORNOGRAPHY, BUT SOMETHING NEW.”
DR. TINA SCHEMER-SELLARS | Sex Educator, Therapist, Speaker, Author of
SEX, GOD, AND THE CONSERVATIVE CHURCH
DOES INTIMATE CONNECTION BETWEEN WOMEN REALLY HAPPEN OR IS IT AN ACT FOR THE MALE GAZE?
To explore this, I posted a CRAIGSLIST AD to film an interview between TWO WOMEN of any background or build to discuss a FIRST-TIME EXPERIENCE.
I genuinely thought a vague description would draw in a broad spectrum, like seasoned sisters in their 60’s or soccer moms in their 40’s. I genuinely didn’t expect a LESBIAN ADULT STAR AND HER LOVER to respond. This was precisely the “performance” I wanted to avoid. OR WAS IT PROVIDENCE?
JUST FOR ONE DAY is my first EROTIC FILM STUDY, an experiment THAT became a portal to holy erotica.
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A FILM STUDY OF PORNOGRAPHY | Just For One Day marked the beginning of my friendship with Lily Cade, a lesbian adult actress who later succumbed to scandal around the #MeToo wave. My year-long film study with her gave me a glimpse into the dark-side of the porn industry and the catch-22’s of toxic masculinity. I questioned the integrity of my own film work with her until I conducted more interviews, distinguishing the difference between the Holy, and the not.
A HOLY EROTICA FILM STUDY | LESBIAN CARNALITY
WHAT IS A FILM STUDY? |
The content is THE FILM. People’s reflections — the muses, co-filmmakers, viewers — are THE STUDY. Welcome to the study of Just For One Day!
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WOMEN RESPOND TO
JUST FOR ONE DAYFILM STUDY 011917 | Editing to Weave Neural Pathways
Producing Just For One Day, I was experiencing joy and pleasure. But to me, joy and pleasure did not feel like joy and pleasure. It felt like numbness. A tangible nothing. An acute blank.
When I screen Just For One Day for men, not much is said among us. What is there to say, really? Men are not taught what to feel or how to feel around feminine erotic innocence. It’s an experience outside of us. I also wonder if they feel the same acute numbness I feel. The void of joy and pleasure.
When I get women’s responses to Just For One Day, it’s a different experience. They all cry or are deeply moved. All. What were the women getting from this film that I, the filmmaker, was not? What exactly is bypassing me? What am I missing out on? I did the following film study to find out.
Cue the spy music. I asked all the women to send me their text-responses to the film. I typed them out as titles and spliced it together into a montage. As I was editing, I felt into their feelings. Their emotions became my director. My heart poured into the shape of each review. Only then could I feel what Just For One Day was giving. You can feel this in the film study.
I needed this film study to literally weave joy-and-eroticism together from my top-down. With every review I edit, joy-and-eroticism weaving together in my head. Edit. Joy-and-eroticism weaving together in my heart. Edit. Joy-an-eroticism weaving together in my body. Since this study, I’ve been able to experience joy and eroticism TOGETHER in my body. Often using this same visualization to get there.
OBSERVATION | Emoting through editing CAN carve new neural pathways.
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STEP 1
SIGN-UP
SUBSCRIBE to receive my monthly Holy Erotica NEWSLETTER and the viewing password to watch Just For One Day. To avoid “erotica” in your in-box, the newsletters will be called:
“EROSTOCRAT”
STEP 2
WATCH
WATCH the videos. Included is Just For One Day, the original short film that started it all, and A RESPONSE, an interview bite from someone who just watched the film.
JUST FOR ONE DAY
FILMMAKER’S LOG 010717 | EDITING
I didn't realize this until I was editing. My first shots were trembling. A lot. But once I captured their first on-screen kiss, everything changed.
I became fluid and controlled. I remember listening to my body. My vibration felt in-sync with theirs, and like a perfect pairing between wine and food, I felt a neutrality between us, undulating with waves of intensity. The more I was in tune with their sex, the more invisible I became, and the closer I could shoot.
My body buzzed for days, well into the edit. I felt twice as heavy with sensations reaching far beyond my skin. I was grounded, aware, different. That is when I realized I had to include myself in the story somehow.
I tried to argue myself out of it. "I can't do this. A youth pastor making porn?" But I am not a pastor as they are not adult actresses. They are Goddesses; and I am the masculine creating a protective environment for the Divine to express Herself freely, where perfect and perverse are the same, and lust and love are synonym. I did not have a pulpit this day. They did.
HYPOTHESIS | If pornography can cause emotional blockage or TRAUMA, then its anti-thesis, HOLY EROTICA , can bypass blockage and HEAL.
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A RESPONSE
FILMMAKER’S LOG 011917 | FRANKIE | “You’re not everybody’s slut.”
This was important for me to hear. I needed someone outside of me to say that what I was doing was NOT PORNOGRAPHY. | I remember editing the line “you’re not everybody’s slut”. I recall having the choice to keep it or remove it, and simply having that choice as a filmmaker, and acknowledging that to myself, well, it meant everything. Just like she’s talking about when connecting intimately. We choose. | I was genuinely surprised by how powerful it was for her to hear, “you’re not everybody’s slut”. Hearing those words were never sexy to me. I found it insulting. But when I listen to her talk about this and what a profound acknowledgment that it is to her being, well, the power of those words change for me too! I CAN say those things because it CAN mean those things. Dirty talk CAN be the most beautiful words in the world. |
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OBSERVATION | Post-screening interviews help viewers feel their emotions.
STEP 3
AFTER CARE
We just heard Frankie’s heart-felt response to the film. WHAT ARE YOU EXPERIENCING FROM THE FILM? JOURNAL YOUR EXPERIENCE OR RECORD YOUR RESPONSE ON YOUR PHONE AND SHARE WITH THE FACEBOOK GROUP. Were you glad you watched the film? Or not?
PERSONAL TIME AND CONVERSATIONS ARE IMPORTANT TO INTEGRATE.
TOUCH PODCAST: Conversations of Spirit and Body
Here is a podcast interview with myself, podcast partner Dr. Ryan Clark, and guest Dr. Tina Schermer-Sellers regarding Just For One Day and HOLY EROTICA.
LAID OPEN PODCAST
Charna talks with Nathan Novero, ex-youth pastor, and the genius behind the seminal work, “Holy Erotica.” Together they touch on a variety of topics that intersect between religion, sex and shame. Additionally, he interviews Charna about her drastically different upbringing, growing up in hippy, addict culture.
“JUST FOR ONE DAY IS A PLATFORM THAT IS DESPERATELY NEEDED AND IT’S MARVELOUSLY EXECUTED HERE WITH REVERENCE, RESPECT, AND ARTISTRY.”
DR. TINA SCHEMER-SELLARS | Sex Educator, Therapist, Speaker, Author of
SEX, GOD, AND THE CONSERVATIVE CHURCH
THANK YOU
for watching our lesbian film!
